I am being very bad and typing an entry while volunteering at the museum. for shame, me. for shame.

last night Jim did come over, right after I finished posting my last entry. his main purpose for coming was to watch a program that he's been monitoring for his job, so he stayed for the half hour and then left. my television and I felt slightly used. this has become a feeling I've been associating with Jim more and more these days. but that's a messy discussion for another time.

so I've been on the Pill for a few months now and I think I want to end it. I've recently come to correlate a tendency to be horribly emotional with each new cycle of pills. for the week I'm off the pills (i.e., bleeding), I find myself smiling at nothing and just having a general pleasantness about me. but then the week ends and I take the month's first pill and a rain cloud forms in my head. I think it's having a negative effect on my ability to see things in a clear perspective. if, for example, one or two things occur during the day that piss me off, I find that I end up feeling gruff or down for the duration of the day instead of being able to just shrug things off or address them and move on. consequently, I take out my bad mood on others (something I am resolutely against as a practice). it seems April's noticed my new irritability as well. like when I told her I felt really emotional a few weeks ago, she responded quickly with, "I KNOW." another really frustrating side effect of the Pill is, as most people know, breast enlargement. my breasts have always been amply sized and with these new hormone supplements, they've gone totally berzerk. it's not pleasant for me. it was difficult enough finding shirts, dresses, etc. that wouldn't look hilarious when I wore them before this little pill came into my life. now, clothes shopping seems a ridiculous undertaking. at any rate, I go to the doctor next week and plan to ask her what my options are. the whole concept of oral contraception freaks me out regardless, so I'll be happy to be rid of it. but if I have a return of the marathon period once I go off it, I guess I'll have to just suck it up or seek a new remedy.

it's hard being a girl.

I have two concerts to look forward to this week: tomorrow is Freedy Johnston, and Saturday is Elvis, Elvis, ELVIS! after typing that out, I realized this makes my musical tastes look like those of an awkward man in his late 30s who lives alone, but oh well. Freedy Johnston was really good the last time I saw him. and as always, Elvis I love.

I feel like my entries have been really boring lately. this is probably due to lack of excitement in my life at present. and due to hatred of employment. I cannot deny that I've bitched many a time about how much I can't stand a lot of people at my work, but I'm glad that once I go home at night I'm able to forget all about it before long since I have no emotional ties to that place. poor Katherine, on the other hand, has been wondering lately if work is the cause of a variety of health problems she's developed. when our VP was out of town for the whole month of May, she was fine. but a few days before he was to come back she developed migraines and now has an earache. that is really horrible if it's a true cause-and-effect.

ok I should probably get back to being a good volunteer.

fin.