uuuggggh my belly is so full. I feel like I'm gonna barf. April and I went for sushi at Hey Sushi, which was hey not so good, so to compensate, we went to Baskin Robbins afterwards. I wanted to get the Fear Factor sundae because April and I have been planning on taking it on ever since I found out it existed. but nooooo, this Baskin Robbins was too good to carry the FFS. I should've known. so instead, I got a scoop of chocolate Oreo cookie and a scoop of S'mores ice cream and ate as much as I could until I arrived at my present state of bloat. I'll finish the leftover bits tomorrow, I'm sure.

I've got a good friend in Stephen. today he brought me burned copies of all the Smiths and Morrissey CDs I don't have. in return, I gave him all my Beatles CDs and my John Lennon Anthology so he could make his own copies of each. I'll buy the real Smiths/Moz albums eventually, fear not, but I needs what I needs now. Stephen's a real pal for that.

(it's Smiths/Morrissey time on Diaryland. look here and you'll see it's true.)

I will be twenty-five years of age in exactly twenty-three days. OLD! Stacey and James P and Kelly are coming to celebrate the week before and I! CAN'T! WAIT! I love my friends. also, after my birthday, I have resolved to not smoke cigarettes anymore. well. I'm not going to buy them anymore. I think maybe I'll keep up my tradition of smoking one cigarette after a job interview. but I want to stop smoking them after I get home from work every day. and I want to, am going to stop smoking when I go out. it's just so damned cancerous and deadly. and I have a touch of asthma, so. yes. I am stopping. it's good. fortunately, I don't have a physical dependance on them. like, I don't get nicotine fits regularly. but still. nothing goes better with red wine than a cigarette. and screwdrivers and smokes are a nice pair as well. but it's all over once October 21st rolls over. I declared it to all my friends back in January and I intend to stick with it. because I don't want to deal with the taunting should I slip back into it later on. like James P. he composed this great email he called "confessions of an ex-smoker" and made this huge committment to stopping, but less than a month later he started up again and now he's buying the things by the carton. Stacey and I choose to ridicule him about it often. it's good to shame people you love. it shows you care.

so now I'm going to explore a little dilemma I have. my friend, or whatever, Jim, is the topic. cut and paste this (http://its4me.diaryland.com/read_on.html) for the backstory. hyperlinking it is fucking up the rest of my entry for some unknown reason. ok, so after that bullshit, I decided I didn't want to see him for a while and I've had a difficult time trying to decide in what capacity I want to maintain our relationship. I don't like to end friendships, as a rule, but he treated me like shit because he is a jackass. so I haven't contacted him since that stupid night, but in the past 2 weeks he's IMed me four times (which was the first contact since), he called me last night, and he IMed me tonight. last night he asked me to go to a movie with him in Evanston and tonight he invited me over to watch "Swingers" and drink margaritas. he's also solicited my calling him to go out the past two weekends. I've turned him down each time because I don't want the first time I see him again to be just the two of us and I don't want to have the feeling that there's an elephant in the room that only one of us (me) notices. also, I kind of hate his face at the moment. so I'm stuck. I mean, seriously, what type of asshole goes down on a girl, accepts oral sex from the girl, and then says "we can't do this anymore. we need to move on," whilst lying naked next to the girl, who is similarly unclothed? I just don't know. at any rate, my solution thus far is to be cold-ish towards him. I just don't know. I'll just stop writing about it now.

is it bad that I like the song for that weird-ass new Disney video game Kingdom Hearts? I can't decide.