last night after the Doves/Elbow concert we went to Matilda's, where the bands eventually showed up. it was entertaining/pathetic to watch the girls swarm the bandmembers. I'm so glad that I have the sense to not throw myself at musicians. what's the point? it's not as if you're going to be friends or lovers for more than that evening and then what do you have left? some stupid bragging right that you prostituted yourself out for an evening? congratulations.

for the sake of fairness, the boys in the bands are big prostitutes too.

one of the roadies was stuffed behind me in the bar, running his hands all over some skinny chick in a sparkly shirt. when I looked over at them for the 40th time, I saw the roadie holding a blood-soaked tissue to his nose and laughing about it. he might as well have been wearing a lighted t-shirt that says "I enjoy snorting copious amounts of cocaine." how stupid.

I don't think I'll waste the energy it'll take to describe how April and Megan were slutting it up here and there during and after the show. no, I won't. but I will that I'm very thankful my companions didn't linger in the concert hall long after the show ended. there are few things in the world that make me feel as whorish as hanging around for the band after a show, especially when I'm in a group of 5 girls, 3 of whom are blondes.

enough of that burst of venom.

I smoked so many cigarettes that my fingers still have a faint odor of smoke. it's pretty disgusting. I'm also pretty tired because I only got about 4 hours of sleep last night. ugh.

Dana is going to Paris in the next few weeks. Stacey emailed me the address of the hotel where she's staying and I almost started crying I got so jealous. every spring I start wanting to be back in Paris. it's cheesy but true. but I often wonder if I went back would it be as wonderful as the study abroad time? I don't know how it couldn't, but the combination of that city and the group of people with whom I spent that time made for a pretty unique experience. anyway. I want to go back.

it is Friday, none of my co-workers are around, and I am happy.