one of my least favorite things about my life at present is that I get paid but once a month. at first, it's exhilarating--I'm rich! look how full my checking account appears! but then I go online and immediately pay out all my bills for the month and I'm left with a pitifully small number, staring at me from the computer screen, sullen and full of condescending pity for my stupid past financial handlings. then I have to play the "how much am I allowed per week?" game, whereupon I mentally budget in food consumption, compulsive CD purchases, and drinking binges and I then feel like having a good sob. it's an emotional dollarcoaster. I'm convinced I can just find a huge sack of money if I look hard enough, but it hasn't happened yet, and I think I'm going to start losing hope. then I also get the feeling I would be really good at winning the lottery, but apparently to do so, one must actually purchase lottery tickets, something which never occurs to me. WHY OH WHY WASN'T I BORN INTO RICHES?!?

money sucks.

and it's Monday.

and I'm tired.

and why can't I lose 20 pounds?

moan.