I now know the true feeling of sexual frustration. Jim came over last night (second night in a row we'd hung out!) to watch Saturday Night Live. after that was over, we watched a movie on tv. then it was awkward because you know, how do you move gracefully into fooling around when you're just sitting on the couch next to one another trying to decide what to do next? finally things started to happen, and just at that moment, I heard a key turn in the lock and April walked in the door. fuck. so he left after about 20 minutes of her coming home and I went to bed all riled up with no one to . . . that was difficult.

went to dinner last night with work people. the group included three 20-somethings (including me), three 30-somethings, and eight other people (physicians) all over 40, 50, 60... at the end of the meal, one of the older men wanted us to all go around the table and say what we wanted to be in high school. so, most people said things like, "I always knew I wanted to be a doctor," or, "I thought I would be an attorney," etc, etc, until it gets to the man who suggested the activity in the first place. he started by saying that he knew he wanted to study medicine, and added, "but what I really didn't want to be was a virgin." stunned silence. one of the over-65 physicians just shook his head and then all of a sudden, Amy and Sara and I burst out in nervous laughter. it was crazy.

really not looking forward to going to work tomorrow. especially since this guy emailed me on Friday asking if I wanted to go to lunch with him. he is a passing acquaintence who doesn't work in my department but who makes me extremely uncomfortable. it's my fault he asked me to lunch--I was way too nice to him and then when he was looking for something, I went online and told him where he could find it--it's stupid. anyway, I don't know how to gracefully avoid it and I think I'm just gonna have to go and make plain the fact that I don't want to date him. god it's going to be so awful. oh why oh why am I so damned charming? (joke)

alright, it's time to shower. I have to buy a wig for this party Tuesday night and if I don't get started now, it'll never happen. going to see AC's show tonight and hope it's good.

ok. � bient�t.